May 23, 2011
by The Hazel-Eyed Angel
Summary: Her presence in this stoic world he'd created sent him into an emotional spiral that brought about the worst of his migraines. The emotional detachment he'd grown fond of now mocked him, & he was forced to hold his tongue because it was too hard to speak.


**A/N: Here is a oneshot dedicated to 2D, obviously X) , for his thirty-third birthday… I'd still go for him XD**

**I tried to capture a kind of Plastic Beach mood for this story, and I have a feeling some of you won't like the fact that this is a oneshot, but hey, it's sweet, and it's appropriate :P**

**lol. Anyhow, I hope everyone enjoys it, and I really need to get back to Empire Ants, but this next chapter has been hard to put together. Dunno why… *shrugs***

**Back to this story –just a reminder this is rated T, simply 'cos it's Gorillaz. It's a oneshot between Noodle and 2D, and this is a pairing story. F'yew don't like it, I don't really give a shit. Why are you reading this then?**

**(Stop doing that…) **

**Read and enjoy! … or else XD**

**Happy Birthday to you, Stuart -2D- Pot! I love yeh, you silly, British dimwit!**

**Disclaimer: (insert sarcastic remark) I love you Jamie and Damon!**

* * *

><p>Murdoc had gone off the deep-end, in 2D's eyes. He was a terror to tortured Stuart. He'd kidnapped him, beaten him, used his worst fears against him, and left him in paralyzed terror for years. Sure, Murdoc was never the kindest to 2D, but what had he done to deserve treatment such as this? Of course, today was an exception. Murdoc had used this day as an excuse to become more shitfaced than usual, and it only ever helped that Russel and Noodle had finally come to Plastic Beach a fair few months ago, after they discovered Murdoc had made another album without them. It took a while, but after the toxins had run their course through Russel's body, he slowly shrank back down to his proper size. The drummer kept a wary eye on Murdoc –he knew what the bassist had done to their singer in the years that had gone by. 2D had told the large man and Noodle everything, though he'd left out how he'd felt about the whole of it. 2D separated himself from it all, as though he was telling his story from someone else's point of view, yet he remained to speak in the first person. 2D had become emotionally detached from the world around him. He didn't know what to believe anymore.<p>

First, five years ago, he had witnessed his closest friend's death –murdered in her young-teen years. He'd mentally broken down. He cracked right then and there. He sought for a new life. A life where he need not become emotionally attached to anyone for the remainder of his existence, but her presence always stalked him, pulling at him with each beating of his hollowed heart. Then, his false world was taken right out from underneath him, and he awoke on a godforsaken land heap in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, where the man he once looked up to became a resented and hated figure in Stuart's black eyes. Then, he came across a false image of his closest friend, who mocked him constantly, laughing at him whilst he cowered in the corner of his prison. Every time he looked to the replica in fear, his instinct expected her to approach him with comfort, but his mind always reminded him that this was an imposter, and would probably kill him if Murdoc demanded so. Such confusion.

And to top it off, one day they showed up unannounced. Out of the blue, quite literally, came the gargantuan drummer, and he bore with him the long dead guitarist. He knew it was her. She didn't even need to take off that wretched mask she was always wearing nowadays. He could tell it was her; the way she talked, the way she walked, and that petite frame of hers. All of it was hers, and he had hated her for it. But, he didn't really hate her. He knew what had happened to her –all of her sufferings, and he could not help but to forgive her, as she had done for him. He had forgotten about her, and left their home behind, and yet she still forgave him. Why? And why had he forgiven her? This, Stuart knew for certain, was what he would never understand. He knew they were once close, as thick as thieves as he'd once heard it put, but how close were they, that they could leave everything awful thing that they'd put each other through behind, and go on as if it had never happened.

Of course, though he'd long forgiven her, they'd never spoken it aloud to one another. It was as though they both knew from one another that they'd been forgiven. She spent time with him, just like when they were younger, and they'd watch movies together, or hang out on the beach, but it wasn't the same… at least not for him. It was hard for 2D. Whenever they were together, he felt stoic, numb, and fearful. He wanted to tell her so much, but every time he tried to confess his feelings to her, about anything -even the simplest of things –it always got stuck in his throat. Her presence in this stoic world he'd created just for himself sent him into an emotional spiral that brought about the worst of his migraines. The emotional detachment he'd grown fond of now mocked him, and he was forced to hold his tongue because it was too hard to say what it did to him. He didn't talk often, but Noodle never voiced her complaints about this, though she always threw 2D glances, and he could see her grimacing from beneath her mask as she looked to him. He hated himself for it. She knew what had happened to the singer, but she also knew that 2D was hiding something. He was hiding what everything had really done to him.

So here it was. It had come again, as it had every year, but it was just another day. There was nothing special or important about it. It was just another reminder that he was growing older and not the naive young dimwit he once was. But he liked that man he once was –he had no worries, he and his best friend had known one another inside and out, and he had looked up to Murdoc as though he were a god and his saint. Of course, now, everything had changed. Every last damned thing.

But, today seemed to be okay. Today, he could deal with it, and it didn't seem to hurt so much. Today was all right… even if it meant he was one year older. How old now? Let's see… Stuart nodded his head to himself. He was thirty-three-years-old today… of course, by now it was the evening. He frowned; thirty-three didn't sound like a happy number at all. But he gave a false smile once more as Noodle handed him a bottle full of rum, and he sat back in his chair, enjoying the past few hours that had gone by. After that last round of shots, Murdoc had passed out in his bedroom, done with the day's events, and the cyborg was locked up in her cupboard, untouched since Noodle's arrival. Russel had wandered off into the floor below 2D's, where his room was located, and everything seemed to be perfect right now. He only wished it would last longer than just today. Peace, comfort, family; everything that he'd missed, but he was afraid to admit it. He didn't want to give in to the nostalgia, and allow himself to find peace. It was frightening to ponder on.

He had a small grin on his face as he allowed his mind to drift, sifting through memories, and 2D sucked in a sharp breath through his nose when he felt a small hand placed upon his. He blinked, shaken from his reverie, and he fixed his gaze on Noodle, now sitting in the chair beside him. She gave him an innocent grin from beneath her mask, and he grinned back softly. "Are you okay, 2D-kun," she questioned him, her voice soft, floating angelically into Stuart's ears.

He sighed, grinning sadly, and he lifted his hand to Noodle's head, tenderly petting her hair and running his fingers through her short indigo locks. "I'm awright, love," he spoke in a low tone; he sounded tired. After a moment of silence, and staring at Noodle, or rather that mask she always wore, 2D bowed his head with a sigh, and Noodle frowned. He didn't know whether it was because they were both about drunk, or because he was finally fed up with feeling this way, but 2D knew he was about to do something he would either regret, or something hopefully better. "Love?" He called her quietly, lifting his face slightly so she could see his blackened eyes. She continued to gaze at him, or at least, that's what he believed since she was facing him. "It's still my birffday," he breathed, his face stolid. He saw Noodle nod, waiting for him to finish. "I 'aven't see yo' face in years… Can I…?" He swallowed, waiting for the 'no' but it never came. He trained his eyes on her now, and saw her head give a miniscule, almost nonexistent nod. He took in a deep breath, reaching out behind her head, feeling for the velvet material she used to tie the mask to her head, and he wrapped his fingers around one of the cords, slowly pulling it away and feeling the soft strings slacken. She flinched when the mask fell away, and 2D gasped silently, reaching out slowly and touching her damaged face. He didn't know what had happened to her, but though it confused him, he didn't want to know. It seemed as though she was finally back for the first time, now that he'd finally seen her face, though not a word was spoken by her party. "Noodle, yo' so beau'iful," he whispered affectionately with a soft grin.

Her face, before stone, now stretched into a timeless smile, and she rubbed her eyes, removing the wetness, "Really?" She asked, hesitant and unbelieving. He knew how she may've felt about it, and it broke his heart when he saw the face she wore. He took her hand and pulled her, urging her to stand to her feet, and she complied, with him still sitting in his own seat. Now he moved her to him, pulling her into his lap, and she curled into his chest, resting her head beneath his chin. "Happy Birth–"

"Naw' yet," he interrupted her, his voice hushed, but painted with desperation. She pulled her face away from his chest, confused. He looked to her, lifting his hand to her face and ghostly trailing his fingers along her skin. "I'm tryin'… S'lot 'arder t'an I f'ought ih wou' be," he told her as though he were finishing an earlier sentence.

"What are you talking about, 2D," she asked him, her eyebrows furrowed together as she watched the ever-changing emotions that plagued 2D's features, and he couldn't seem to find one to focus on whilst he bore his soul out to her.

"Noodle…t'is is really 'ard," he breathed, leaning his head back against the chair, and then Noodle saw as his eyes became strained, as though he were mulling over his cluttered thoughts carefully, forcing the words out that she'd heard him speak.

"What's hard," she pressed, her voice immersed in concern, etched into all of her features. She placed her hand on 2D's face, running her thumb beneath his eye.

"Since yew've b'n gone… ih's no' te same," he spoke quietly, his voice almost unheard. He finally returned his eyes to Noodle now, his dark emotionless voids locked within her green irises, and he took her hand from his face, placing it over his heart. "S'ollow… I dun feel a 'ole loh anymo'," he told her, and she looked from her hand on his chest, to his face. He could see the apology within her eyes, and it tore him apart. He hadn't meant to make her feel guilty. He was just trying to tell her how hard it was for him. He placed his hand just behind her ear, pulling her face up to his, and she gasped as his lips came crashing down softly upon hers, his breath washing over her face as he kissed her, and she melded her lips to his, completely bewildered by something she'd never even given thought to before. Not once had she thought about kissing the singer, but now that she was, the burning she felt between them she hoped to never end, but too soon, 2D's lips parted from her, and she looked up to him with wide eyes. He smiled, his eyes still full of sorrow, and she bit her lip, wondering just what they were supposed to do now. But 2D took the liberty in making that decision for her yet again. He wrapped his arms around her body and hugged her against his chest again, resting his cheek upon the top of her head, and she rested her face against his neck, a feeling of comfort washing over her as she breathed in his thick scent, misted over with just a hint of alcohol. "S'been years since I've felt anyfin' close ta t'is…" he spoke, his voice rough.

"Anything close to what," he heard her whisper, and he sighed leaning his head back against the chair once more. He didn't think it could have felt so good to hold Noodle in his arms again, as if everything were right once more, but as his eyes danced across the ceiling, he remembered just exactly where they were, and realised it could never be the same.

"Anyfin' close to _anyfing_," he breathed, and she bit her lip, her eyes becoming hot and irritated by the threat of tears. "I 'aven felt… _alive_… since yew've been gone…" he whispered, his chest heavy with grief. "Oh gawd… s'ard te be sayin' awl o'tis," he choked. Noodle pulled her face away from his chest again, her lips parted as though she were about to speak, and as 2D trained his eyes on her face, he lifted his hand to cup her cheek. "Dun talk… please…" he pleaded. "S'awready 'ard f'me…" She closed her mouth now, staring at him quietly. "So 'ard…" he spoke under his breath. When he was silent, his mind drifting off again, Noodle curled against his body, her head against his shoulder as she waited for him to speak once more. Her eyes became heavy as time passed them by, and all she could hear was the lullaby 2D's heart sang to her as it pounded against his ribcage, along with the unsteady flow of breathing that came to and from his lungs. She was about to drift off when she felt 2D begin to shift, and his hand wandered to her shoulder, trailing down her arm, and then moving back up. It would have been fine, except that his touch left a trail of fire beneath Noodle's skin, and her cheeks became painted with a light pink as he continued to stroke her softly. She let out a relaxed sigh as he continued, nuzzling her face against his shirt, and his other arm hugged her around her waist tighter, holding her against him, afraid to let her go.

"I cried," his voice broke the silence. Noodle made no move, but her eyes were now opened widely, her sole focus on 2D's words, and he knew she was listening, so he continued after taking in a deep breath. "When I f'ought yew wos dead… I cried… fo' a long time…" he breathed in a low voice, travelling only to Noodle's ears and no further. "S'ard… t'say m'wrong…" he began once more, "I f'ought yew 'ated me… n'I wos wrong abou' leavin… cos now m'not te same… now I dun really know 'oo I am awl tha' well…" he explained, his tone almost nonchalant, but Noodle could hear the desperation in his voice, and the straining features from what she could see of his face. "Since yew've been gone… m'not te same… nuffin's te same… everyfin's diffren'…" he muttered, taking in another deep breath and closing his eyes for a moment. "Noodle..." She heard him call her name, and her heart skipped a beat when he finally locked his eyes with hers again. He swallowed back the tightness in his throat, a tear rolling down his face, but he gave no mind to it. "I… I'm so lost… I can't really, like… I can't connect wiff anyfin… I can't feel anyfin' righ, n'I feel so empty and lonely… an' I feel depressed like…" He saw Noodle bite her lip as he spoke to her, but he continued, not knowing if he'd be able to get this out if he put it off any longer. "Sometimes I jus' wanna go ta sleep an' not wake up cos ih hurts so much…" he admitted, his entire body feeling heavy with anguish and guilt for allowing himself to become this way. "I feel like, when fings goh 'ard afta I f'ought yew wos dead, I jus' closed me eyes, an' moved ta the back o'me mind… An' cos I always did tha, awl o'me feelings jus' kinda goh lost in time… awl o'yestaday's feelins…" he spoke, seemingly lost in his ramblings, as if he were moving through everything he'd been through in the past few years as he tried to explain how it had effected him, but it was difficult to find words for. "Afta a while… everyfin' jus' kinda seemed pointless… an' I wasted away… an' well… people's faces jus' sorta blurred ou', and ih's like I didn' see people's faces… jus' like, their shapes, y'know," he told her, squeezing her arm as though he were checking to see if she were still there, or to feel if she was real. "Noodle…" he whispered, the name sounding foreign on his tongue. She met his eyes, gazing into his endless voids, "I really missed yew…"

She grinned sadly, turning her body and hugging her arms around his chest. He took in a deep, shaken breath, returning her embrace and pulling her against him tightly. "I missed you too, 2D-kun," she whispered to him, and he shivered while her breath washed over the side of his face as she spoke into his ear. After a moment, her breathing hitched, and 2D could feel the wetness on her face as she buried her face against his neck, sobbing lightly. He brushed his hands through her hair, trying to comfort her, and she hugged herself closer. "I'm sorry, Stuart…" she choked, "That I hurt you…" He remained silent as she spoke; his face was stone, but his heart ached for her. He'd forgiven her long ago. She hadn't done this… he'd done it to himself, but he needed her to help him get back.

As she lifted her face to meet his gaze, he felt his heart stutter, and he grimaced when he saw the grief he'd caused for the both of them. He sighed, and his eyes became strained as he tried to get those last words out. "Noodle… I… I fink… I… Noodle… I…" he closed his eyes, bowing his head slightly. Within a short moment, he gasped when he felt Noodle's breath caress his face, and he opened his eyes, paralyzed when he saw how close her face had become. She saw his now opened eyes and hesitated, and he saw her irises move to his lips. He leaned forward, cupping her face gently as his lips grazed against hers, and their lips sealed together in a tender kiss. He closed his eyes once more when their lips parted, and Noodle shifted, kissing his cheek affectionately.

"I love you…" His dark voids opened widely when he heard those words flutter off of her tongue, and his body felt as though he would float away as he met her gaze, with her smiling at him tenderly.

"I…" he choked, trying to getting the words out. He took a deep breath, a tear moving down his face, and he grinned as Noodle brushed it away with soft fingers, running them over the bruise beneath his eye. "I love yew, too," he whispered in a low voice, and she smiled widely.

He flinched when she leaned forward, but sighed as she kissed his lips again, brushing his hands through her short hair. "Happy Birthday, 2D-kun…" she told him, happy to finally get to tell him those words. He smiled as she kissed his lips again, and she gasped as he nipped her lip. She grinned as he smirked at her, and she leaned closer to him, coming back for more…


End file.
